31 October 2020

The Scariest Halloween

The toilet didn't just seem to be alive. It was crawling with microscopic monsters just waiting to suck the life out of any healthy bum that made contact.

The downstairs toilet was equally as bad. Both were filled to the brim with poo, the vengeance of an adopted child abandoned by her birth mother 14 years earlier, forsaken by her runaway adopted brother who'd found his way out of this hell hole, and tormented endlessly by her adoptive mother who just couldn't tolerate the tiniest of terrors.

She thought if she intentionally blew the adoption, she could wind up in a foster home with a cell phone of her own and a car she could hotwire in the middle of the night to sneak off to a bar while the foster parents slept. Mom's car was a stick, and she couldn't get the darned thing to move once she rolled it out of the driveway and into the street. Heaven only knows how many times she tried!

Never in her wildest dreams did she expect her adoptive mom to keep trying. Love! The ugliest word on the planet!

She had tried to frighten her mom by standing over her as she slept, kitchen knife in hand, ready to plunge it into Mom's throat. She had tried cutting Mom's hair while she slept and burning it in a candle near the bed. She had tried to pretend she'd committed suicide by hanging from the wardrobe bar in the closet, a belt noose around her neck.

Mom had been ordered to remove anything that could be used as a weapon from the home. No silverware, no appliances with cords, no scissors, no yarn... The house was now disgustingly sterile.

This woman still would not give up! What was wrong with her?!?

Well, she'd just show her! Used tampons were stuffed between the bed and the wall. Used condoms were strewn beneath the bed. Holes were fist-punched into all the walls and then filled with little baggies of dried green leaves, if not roach clips and half-toked joints, too, before being recovered with Megadeth, Iron Maiden and Slipknot posters. Oh, and the finishing touch!!! Lots of little white pills in every nook and cranny. Most were TicTacs, but Mom would never know. And the toilets. She could just picture the horror on Mom's face!

And with that, she snuck out her bedroom window, into the night, screeching with the most evil laugh she could shriek. Several hours later, a blue and white Crown Victoria with lights flashing and siren blaring returned her home, putting a temporary end to her stolen cigarette and bootleg booze rampage.

It truly was Mom's worst Halloween. Until 2020, that is...

The kids are grown and have kids of their own now. They try hard to make up for the trauma they caused their mom so many years ago. Love occasionally blossoms beautifully. Mom made Halloween snowflakes, masks and costumes for the grands. Everything was going as well as could be expected with all the nightmares of 2020.

The toilet backed up into the tub on Halloween's Eve. Bringing back memories of those Halloween toilets literally in another century. Mom's been bailing poopy water all morning.

And she thought bailing snow melt from the window well was bad!!!


  1. Blah, a backed up loo and dealing with poo is no fun indeed. Not giving up on the kiddo is the way to be.

    1. Ha ha! You squeezed a rhyme in there, Pat! It wasn’t my most fun weekend, but the bathroom and basement have never been cleaner, and that’s kind of a great start for a month of Thanksgiving!

  2. Replies
    1. Sorry, Regula. It was meant to be Halloween humor, not traumatic. I’ve survived two very needy kids and now I think about eight or nine basement floods, two of them poopy, so I’m going into this new month with a song of joy!

  3. Oh Deb, how awful! I hope it got resolved. Some bittersweet memories for you. Hugs to you.

    1. Thank you, Sue! It was indeed fixed. Tree roots, so we have been advised to have the drain cleaned again annually to keep this from happening again. This was the second time for the roots, and I think next Halloween will feature another drain swish. That would definitely beat what we just went through!!!

      Bittersweet memories indeed. Back then, I didn’t know what kind of people my kids would become, and it was scary. I’m very thankful to have good, budding relationships with both of them now!


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