25 February 2011

Friday Funny

Ken Nolan and friends majestically climbing Uncompahgre Peak in winter
My artistic interpretation of Ken Nolan and friends climbing Uncompahgre Peak in winter

Note: Several years ago, Ken Nolan, mountaineer extraordinaire, spotted paw prints in the snow leading to wing tip imprints at the end of the four-legged critter's journey. Ken, tongue-in-cheek, challenged fellow mountain climbers to explain the photo below in 10,000 words. This was my 2,548-word rendition of what really happened that day in 2006.

Class Assignment by Ken Nolan
"Class Assignment" by Ken Nolan

The snow was 18 inches deep, and the sun finally was shining. Blue skies were beckoning Bunny out of her protective den. She’d cautiously survived hunting season, third year in a row. Now it was time to see which of her forest friends had been equally as lucky.

Dressed in her finest and whitest winter wear, Bunny hopped out into the fresh powder, sinking a good two inches.

Bunny in summer“Oh, my friends can wait a while! This is just too much fun!” she giggled as she rolled about, kicking up whirlwinds of spindrift and catching twirling snowflakes on her tongue. After a few minutes of careless frolicking, she absentmindedly rolled into a slushy discolored bank. Her clothes were now all wet, and yellow to boot.

“Ah, I see you’ve played in your morning coffee,” cooed Wiley Coyote, who had been vigilantly stalking her until she managed to season herself with a most distasteful spice.

Now alert and adding an attractive tint of embarrassment to her shiny coat, Bunny backed away into an Acme willow with hungry tentacles.

“You snot!” she cried, “Now look what you’ve done!” She tried to brush sporadic pinpoints of bright red blood off her coat, but realized that removed her fortuitous aromatic protection, too.

“I guess I’ll just have to wear polka dots today,” she smirked as she burrowed deep into the snow in an attempt to cave her way out of this mess.

Wiley in summer“Don’t waste your strength, Buggzette,” the coyote crooned. “I’ve lost my appetite for succulent hare, unless you happen to have any freshly bathed and groomed relatives lurking nearby.”

“Don’t you have any roadrunners to chase?” she snarled.

“No, I ate them all.”

She knew he was lying. She could see his ribs. She also knew her well-timed respite would last only until her harejob wore off. It was time for a visit to a distant neighbor.

6 comments :

  1. Maybe your next fundraiser project shouldn't be snowflakes; maybe it should be photos being "explained." This tale is cute and funny. Great photos, too.

    Renee :)

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  2. Loved your story ... your critters really came to life!

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  3. What a great tale!

    I've given you an award, whether you accept them or not, you deserve it. You can visit my blog to read more.

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  4. I did truly love your tale. I imagine stories like that... but never in quite such vivid detail. I love the marten photo (did you take it?)- I'd really love to get a photo of one from our woods. My wildlife cam captured a marten rump and tail a while ago but he hasn't been back to show his face.

    Thank you so much for sharing your story and photos!

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  5. You made me smile. Very creative and wonderful humor!

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  6. Thank you, Renee, JAC, Clara, KB and Marcie! These were some fun comments to come home to!

    KB, the wing tips in the snow and the marten are the only pictures I did not take. Ken Nolan allowed me to use his photo that started this whole thing, and Michelle Holihan of Mountain Nomad Photography graciously allowed me to link to her marten photo, the only animal in the story I have yet to be able to photograph! (Although I did have one run across my legs while I was shooting the Maroon Bells on my belly a couple of autumns ago... Always seem to have the camera pointed in the wrong direction when a marten stumbles into the scene!)

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