Heart Strings

(affiliate links to my publications)

Three summers ago, I learned not to set any book writing/publishing goals during the hot months. I was so excited about publishing my first book in the autumn of 2012, I set the goal for my next book to be finished by July 1, 2013. When I missed that goal, I shot for October but accomplished nothing. I reset the goal to the next October, in 2014. Once again, nothing got done. I reset the goal for October 2015.

When my adult adopted son called me for the first time in a very long time nearly a year ago now, my heart was tugged toward that old book once again.

In 2013, I learned I can't set super ambitious summer goals while I'm working full time and trying to get in shape for cross-state bicycle tours. It sets me up for failure, which in turn leads to depression, which I'm trying to avoid because writing and depression don't always go together so well. At least not for happy books...

It's a little easier for me to devote time to long-term writing when there isn't enough light outside to ride, garden, natural dye or take pictures of flowers, wildlife and landscapes. However, because I battle Seasonal Affective Disorder, I have to put a little more effort into making sure winter blues don't show in my hibernation compositions.

The idea for "Heart Strings" was born in 2002 (in the dead of winter, I might add) when I took a day off work to look for my adopted son, who had taken an unauthorized field trip. (He ran away.) My plan was to check all his hangouts, and the school, just in case, because surely someone would know where he was and if he was all right.

Imagine my reaction when I learned the school knew where he was.

I was so shocked, I was speechless for a jaw-dropping length of time. Then I was devastated. The school couldn't tell me where my son was unless I filed a police report, which I had not done because he was just weeks away from turning 18, and I didn't want him to begin adulthood with a police record hanging over his head. I also was concerned he might go on the run again if police were actively looking for him, and there was a degree of comfort in knowing he had a roof over his head, even if I didn't know the location of that roof. A degree of anger toward the unknown harboring parents for not letting me know where he was also throbbed, but a degree of comfort knowing he was safe and fed trumped the negative emotions.

I felt so helpless. On top of the whole abandonment/rejection issue.

I went home and began to type.

"Heart Strings" is the result of that day. It is not the story of my son, although he did indeed inspire portions of it. Yes, he really did throw a bowling ball at one of my framed photographs!

Because "Heart Strings" originally was written during winter, mostly during darkness, and mostly while I was feeling I was a failure as a parent and living a meaningless life, the original ending had a very dark tone. VERY dark. There was no resolution. No happy ending.

In the book club I was a member of at the time, many of the books we read were criticized for being too fairy-tale. My peers said real life doesn't come out like that. They yearned for something genuine, not sugar-coated.

Those comments definitely had an influence on the ending of "Heart Strings". When you adopt through a government agency, believe me, there is no fairy-tale ending. You get years and years of labor pain! (Yet I'd adopt again if the situation were right.)

More recently, friends and a few readers who indulged in the first chapter of "Heart Strings" at the end of "Heels Over Head" expressed a yearning for happy endings. Life is tough enough these days without being glued to a depressing book that leaves you hanging at the end.

That's why this book wasn't complete in 2013. Or 2014. I had to rewrite the ending. I finished and copyrighted it in 2015. All it needed was a cover.

Last week, I finished a quilt I thought would make the perfect cover. I had a couple of other cover ideas... a child's hand appliqueing fabric hearts, a distraught and frightened young boy slung over a man's shoulders, reaching out to his mother and screaming, or a framed appliqued heart. I'd scheduled photo shoots with two different children during the last year in an attempt to compose one of those cover ideas. Both times, real life got in the way for me or for them, and the photo shoots never happened. When I finally finished my Heart Strings quilt last week, I decided I should just use it and get this book going instead of waiting for the perfect photograph.

The quilt fits in perfectly with the new ending. The new ending makes me very happy every time I read it. I love "Heart Strings" like I love both of my adopted kids. (But books don't sneak out the window in the middle of the night, run up your phone bill or wreck your car, even though the characters in the books might do those very same things... ha ha!)

"Heart Strings" has always been my second-favorite composition. Now, with this new ending, I like it even better. I guess even I need a too-good-to-be-true ending once in a while!

"Heart Strings" now is officially available at iTunes, Barnes & Noble and Kobo, and at Smashwords. In addition, "Heart Strings" also is available print-on-demand at Lulu. Even though "Heart Strings" was released symbolically on February 14, the book is not a romance. This is a tale of parenting like you've never read, heard, viewed or experienced before. Unless you've been the foster or adoptive parent of a troubled child.

I hope you will enjoy "Heart Strings" as much as I do!

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Heart Strings

(affiliate links to my publications)

It's done! My next book is done!!!

Each time I thought I was done, I realized I had one more step to go.

When I finished adding a chapter to help the new ending roll smoothly, I thought I was done. But I still had to write the last chapter.

When I finished writing the last chapter, we celebrated with dinner out! That's a really big deal for us! We don't go out to eat often. But the book wasn't truly done. I still had to write the epilogue.

The epilogue presented a challenge. Just how far in the future do I need to project to prove this new ending isn't a fluke or a short-term solution?

After three days of mentally testing different time gaps, I was done. The epilogue pulled itself together via a rewrite of the original epilogue. My book went from tragic to joyous in just two chapters and a revised epilogue!

Miracles really do happen, right?!?

But then I realized I still have to include the first chapter of my next book.

No problem. I've got four more done. If done is what you call the stage Heart Strings was at two years ago...

All four "done" books need at least a bit of rewriting. Likely all four need to be polished and dressed in their Sunday best. Which one goes next? Eeny meeny miney mo? In order of birth? In reverse order of birth?

Reader vote?!? Would that open a hornet's nest?!?

"Heart Strings" is intended to be the first of an adoption trilogy. Do I jump into Part Two next?

Part Two isn't done yet. Of course. Part Three is done. Part Two never got past simmer.

The middle volume of a trilogy traditionally is the darkest. Part Two, working title "Brashley" (yes, you have permission to laugh if you catch that inside joke), is dark. Insert scary music here. I don't know if I want to give Part Two a happy ending. Then again, perhaps I have come a long way since I began writing it, and perhaps it doesn't need to be quite so dark anymore. One thing for sure: I don't expect it to be done by the end of the year. I'm too happy to write sad stuff!

The third book in the adoption series, "Gemini Bridges", is done, has been for what feels like forever, but it really needs to be the third book. It's happy. It's my fourth- or fifth-born. "Heart Strings" and "Brashley" didn't come along until much later. Years later.

"Back Issues" was the third book I ever finished, way back when I was still a teenager, and the third book I ever sent to a publisher (many years later). It's the one I'm referring to when I ramble on and on about the time I finally got a great response from a potential publisher. The publisher back then, long before the turn of the century (a seriously dated novel), wrote (paraphrased), "Good plot, believable characters, well-written, but you don't have a name. You aren't marketable."

Am I marketable now? :)

Then there's the time travel novel, no working name yet. It's fun. It's done. I wrote it for my kids, and they loved hearing it what feels like 152 years ago. My cousins loved it when I read it to them what feels like 150 years ago. It feels that old now. I kind of would like to see it published, sort of, and yet, there's a part of me that wants to keep that one to myself, not share it with the whole world. It's like a baby, I guess, and I'm not sure I want to give it up for adoption.

The next best candidate is one I don't want to name publicly yet because my working title is awesome, and no one else has used that title yet. (!!!!!) (By the time I published "Heels Over Head", two other books and a band had claimed that same name!)

After a good bit of thought, I chose "Back Issues". I proofread it and polished it up a bit, then included the first chapter at the end of "Heart Strings." My book is done! I'm done! I can publish it now!!!

Except...

Well, next I had to register it with the copyright office.

The very next day, after not too much brain ache on the government website, I hit the "Submit" button and filed "Heart Strings" for copyright registration. Woohoo! I'm DONE!!!

Well, except, now I have to shoot the cover... you know, that mind-boggling piece. An award-winning, eye-grabbing, show-stopping photograph that will capture and hold reader attention in thumbnail size and generate tons of sales.

Will this journey never end?!?

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Back on the Keyboard Again

(affiliate links to my publications)

I hadn't worked on my novel "Heart Strings" for nearly two years. I knew how I wanted to change the ending of the book I hope will be my next published work, but I couldn't think of a creative way to set the stage to get there. Too many life changes at work, too many bicycle rides to train for, too many commitments to keep the existing story details straight and existing characters in character.

So the project has been stewing for nearly 22 months now. Like an unfinished quilt. Every once in a while, the book would tug on me, and every once in a while, a reader would ask me how the next book is coming along.

This continued until I read a Pat Hatt blog post about writers who claim they don't have time to write. OUCH!

I pulled the book out one more time, revised my publishing goal, retouched an unpublished blog post I'd composed two years ago about finishing the book (which of course did not happen then), rescheduled the blog post about finishing the book, then began reading "Heart Strings" all over again. Because I'd forgotten much of the fine details. Plus, I've found taking a long break is the best way to proofread.

When I proofread, unfortunately, sometimes my brain sees what it wants to see and not what's really there. My eyes see what I thought I wrote and not what I really wrote. That's why a good second set of eyes is ALWAYS recommended.

I did follow the proofreading route with this very same book when I finished it the first time about eight years ago. I paid a professional proofreader. Three months later, I decided to take a look at the book one more time, before I sent it off, and I was horrified by the typos the proofreader had missed! I was horrified I made those typos and didn't catch them before paying someone to proofread, but mostly, I was ticked because I'd shelled out good money – for nothing!


(The book had a tragic ending back then, and when confronted, the proofreader said he got so caught up in the story, he didn't see the errors at all. He asked if I planned a sequel, and I don't think he was asking just about future proofreading opportunities. The company I'd hoped might publish the book, LONG, LONG before self-publishing became so easy, returned my book with a hand-written note apologizing for whatever I'd experienced that inspired the book. Ouch! And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why "Heart Strings" sat like an unfinished quilt so long. Deep down in my heart, I knew I had to change the ending, even though I liked the way I'd left the story hanging. It reflected what happens in real life; no fairy tale endings for me!)

Once I finished reading the book again (and finding even more mistakes, yikes) in February, I stalled for a whole day because I still couldn't think of how to transport my characters from the uncomfortable spot in which I'd left them to a happier place.

The next day, I decided I'm not going to let procrastination and writer's block block me again. I'm just going to start typing, and whatever comes out of my fingertips, that's how I'll find a way to move my characters to the new ending. I didn't have a plan. I didn't have any inspiration. There were no existing dangling plotlines I could pick up and weave into fantasy.

So what was the first thing that came to mind? The transition I hoped would roll easily off my fingertips and into the pages of the book?

Making a quilt. Imagine that. And it fits the story beautifully!

Now, let's see how long it takes for me to finish the fabric of this book this time...

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The End, or is it The Beginning...

Every time I search for something, I find something else. I was looking for a specific photo of my baby sister when I came across this shot, the authentic baby owl from Part IX of "Heels Over Head". Back when I was looking for the baby owl, all I could find was a fully matured rehabilitated owl I once photographed before it was re-released into the wild in Rocky Mountain National Park.

What better way to wrap up "Heels" than with a fuzzy and bewildered little (well, okay, not so little) fellow who likely is a wise old hoot now?

Serializing "Heels Over Head" on my blog has been one of the most fun and rewarding things I've done on this blog since I began blogging back in 2009. It has been so fun and fulfilling to live the dream, interact with many readers who otherwise don't comment much and to receive feedback that helped me push forward into the realm of self-publishing.

It's also nice to get my Thursdays back. (Said with a smile.) I've enjoyed having posts ready to go on Thursdays that didn't require anything more than pushing a button, but I missed the spontaneity of posting events as they happen, too.

Nevertheless, I wouldn't change a thing. I am so glad I tested the water, and I'm so glad I finally took the intimidating and sometimes even frightening diving board plunge. (Looks like the book is finally on its way to securing a genuine U.S. Copyright Office registration, too! Yeehaw!)

I hope you've enjoyed the "Heels Over Head" journey, too, and I hope if you purchase the ebook, you might leave feedback on any of the sites where the book is available.

Although I'm returning to live posts on Thursdays beginning next week (unless work and/or life get so busy, I am forced to plug in an Eye Candy or two), I'm going to miss the anticipation of a new book segment each week and finding out what readers think.

Bottom line, though, is I hope my story helps others overcome difficulty and gain confidence to accomplish the things they dream and love.

And yes, I'm anxiously plugging away at proofreading "Heart Strings" so I can self-publish it next. My goal is July 1. Now we'll see what I'm really made of, with super big bike rides coming up between now and then!!!

Thanks for riding along with me the last 25 weeks, and thank you for encouraging me to do what I've needed to do since 2006. Thank you for reading!

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Twist and Shout!

(affiliate links to my publications)

I want to shout from the mountain tops: "Extra, Extra, Read All About It!" or "Hot Off The Press!" or "Inked!" But none of those seem appropriate. Exactly what do you shout with glee when you've published your first ebook???

"Heels Over Head" is now officially available in ebook format. This step has been a very long time coming; my goal was February 1! There were a few hurdles to clear and one speed bump I sort of side-stepped because it didn't seem to be leading to the finish line.

But my book is done and published, and the adrenaline rush feels GREAT!

I selected Smashwords from a host of options because they offer free conversion to all the different ebook formats (and free ISBN and free distribution to just about every retail seller on the planet), as long as the author properly formats the original manuscript.

Smashwords founder Mark Coker provides several thorough and informative guides to walk newbies through the hoops of self-publishing. One of his mottos is to keep learning. Never stop learning. I agree. So I read each of his manuals. Cover to cover.

I had a very difficult time keeping a straight face through the step-by-step guide to formatting a Word document in preparation for Smashword's "meatgrinder," which grinds submissions into each of the different formats for all the different electronic reading devices. I extensively format Word documents on a daily basis (often stripping them of all existing formatting and starting over from scratch because the formatting underlying the documents under multi-user review becomes unbelievably corrupt being passed from one computer to the next). I was shocked to learn someone else on this planet has actually been able to navigate and comprehend the maze called Microsoft and write legible and intelligent instructions to teach others from varying backgrounds how Microsoft Word works. Deep down inside, I was a bit jealous. Man, if only I had done that a year or many ago, it could have been my name as author on that spectacular guide!!!

Bottom line: If you plan to self-publish an ebook, make sure to read "The Smashwords Style Guide". Learning how to use Word properly will prevent so many headaches down the road.

Formatting my first book took me all of two nights once I finished reading the formatting guide (which I did on the train while commuting to and from work). Reconfiguring the book cover to meet Smashwords' guidelines took another day and many volunteer eyeballs. I wanted to make sure the cover I designed would be catchy and thought-provoking enough to draw interest even at thumbnail size. I instructed my volunteer testers to study book covers on their favorite book website and to visualize my proposed cover amongst the collection. Would it stand out? Would it make them want to read the book?

Once I had my cover finalized, it took maybe 15 minutes to fill out all the required information and submit the book. Pushing that final button made me feel as if I was on top of a 14er even though I was about 8,000 feet lower in real life. And then when I sold my first book two days later, well, my feet haven't touched the ground since.

I backtracked and upgraded my book description after reading other book descriptions on Smashwords. Sometimes I have to forget the "tight and terse" training I grew up with writing for newspapers. Advertising was never my bag of tea. Marketing is not something I chose willingly to study. But I'm finding I must develop those skills if I want to compete in the vast market of writers out there. My first book description was rather plain jane; after rewriting it, I had to take a deep breath and count to ten. I couldn't believe I'd written something so bold! But I think the revision is much more effective than my initial attempt.

My edits were published and effective immediately. Wow! Made my toes tingle!

The speed bump I encountered along the way was an attempt to copyright the book via the US Copyright Office. Back in the days of Journalism 101, every teacher and professor instructed prospective writers to get everything copyrighted. Period.

I submitted the book and paid the fee, answering all the questions as best I could and documenting everything I could to prove this book is mine. A few weeks later, I received a response from the US Copyright Office explaining I would have to buy a copyright for each segment of my book that has appeared on my blog.

My stomach turned. I don't have that kind of money just lying around. My head spun. Authors serialized books or book segments in newspapers I've worked for, and they didn't have to register each individual segment. I responded as professionally and unemotionally as I could and waited (and waited, and waited) to find out if my investment had been wasted.

Laws have changed and evolved as technology has grown. I didn't know what to do. A wonderful writers support group on Ravelry (yes, writers who knit and crochet; Ravelry has a special interest group for everything you could possibly imagine) encouraged me to proceed with epublishing without the copyright. Just by writing the book, they said, my work is copyrighted. They said a US Copyright Office registration is not necessarily necessary.

If someone does plagiarize an author's work, the official copyright will make a difference in a jury award, in the neighborhood of three to five digits if not officially copyrighted to six digits or more if the author holds that official copyright. I have all the documentation I need to provide beyond a shadow of a doubt in a court of law this work is mine, and that's all I need, according to the experts on Ravelry. Yes, the extra money would be pretty nice, but do I really want to tie up my spare time fighting this kind of thing for what could turn into years?

NO.

I've spent enough time in court with motor vehicle accidents and adoptions. I have no desire to see the inside of a courthouse again. Especially when that time could be tied up with riding or hiking or photographing or writing or crafting or even gardening. And that's that.

So, I may have lost the initial fee to copyright my book. I may have to file again and pay the fee one more time, but that's better than paying the fee 30 times... I must keep learning. I'm learning a lot more about copyright law than I ever thought I'd need. Meanwhile, my book is on the electronic shelves, and that was my goal. So nothing but smiles on this side of the computer right now.

And why, oh, why, you ask, would anyone want to pay 99 cents for a short little ebook that's already freely available, albeit in pieces, on the internet? I'm so glad you asked!

I've included the first chapter of my next book, which I'm now proofreading, at the end of the ebook version of "Heels Over Head." That first chapter is not going to appear here or anywhere else until I epublish the book. After I finish proofing the next book, formatting it for publication as I go, I will conceptualize cover designs. And then another 15 minutes with Smashbooks, and I'll have two titles to my name!

Anyone who has been reading my blog for a while knows I adopted two special needs children at an older age and raised them as a single parent. Words cannot even begin to describe what kind of inspiration adoption of difficult-to-place children provides. My next book is the first of three works of fiction I've composed, a trilogy of sorts, but only in relation to subject matter, not plot or characters. I hope the first chapter of "Heart Strings" will tug at your heart and make you hungry for my next book.

Because then you can stay on my case and nag me until I get it done! And that way, it won't sit on the shelf for eight years or more waiting to see the light of electricity.

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