17 August 2012

Friday Funny

Open wide and say AWWWWWWW
When I first wrote this post, I was terrified to ever publish it, thinking it may likely be in very poor taste. But then the news of the hoax came out, and, well, AWESOME! Now I can laugh without guilt!!!

I'm not one to ever make fun of someone else's pain or hard luck, and I'm definitely not into throwing away my career or life in a streak of vengeance. I am 100% against violence. (Although I've often said I'd love to kick the crap out of cancer...)

Having been dumped a time or two in my life, however, and having helped friends who've been dumped survive their heartbreaks, I couldn't help but fight back a guilty snicker when I read about the man who went to his dentist, the girlfriend he'd cheated on and then dumped just two days earlier, instead of finding a new dentist when he had a toothache. The former girlfriend dentist knocked him out, locked the door and removed all his teeth, and his new girlfriend, the one he cheated with, dumped him because he's toothless.

The story was preposterous. Totally and unequivacably.

Even funnier is that news outlets around the world picked it up and carried it in its entirely without checking sources. I once, way back in the days of dinosaurs, before cell phones and internet, interviewed the supposed "victim" of a household accident, and the very small town newspaper where I was employed as one of four reporters, ran the story. The newspaper and I then had to live down the egg on our faces when we learned from some of our seasoned readers the "victim" was a scam artist who traveled from town to town concocting such stories.


As I read reader comments left on the toothless story, I realized there are a whole lot of Jay Leno Wannabes with potentially promising careers out there. I saved some of the best comments because they made me laugh. And now that the original story is a hoax, I can laugh all over again! Tooth, tooth for the price of one! Hopefully these gems will bring a smile to your face, too(th).

"Oh your ex dumped your clothes on the front yard??? Poor guy... mine ripped out all my teeth."

"I'm surprised she didn't leave him the one tooth that was hurting in the first place - just to add insult to injury."

"Lucky for him his ex wasn't his proctologist."

"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. And that's the tooth."

"And the molar of this story is..."

"No wisdom teeth to begin with."

"She gave him anesthetic. That was nice."

"Fatal Extraction."

"Before surgery, he should have had her swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth."

"Dental care from your ex can be hazardous to your smile."

"Confucius say: If dating dentist and break up, find new dentist."

"I read somewhere this had happened to him before. His previous girlfriend was a brain surgeon, and he went to her for a headache. Guess what she removed?"

"No more lying through his teeth."

"Now he's Gumby, and she's in the Pokey."

"He's toothless; she's ruthless."

"What's the problem? Won't his teeth just grow back?"

"Look, Ma, no cavities!"

"He loves me..." Yank! "He loves me not..." Yank! "He loves me..." Yank! "He loves me not!" Yank!


  1. This so reminds me of The Blair Witch Project! I remember when I believed my daughter that it was a true story, (she knew I'd only go if I thought it was real) Then the truth came out! Fooled! Wow that evening star glowing in a tree with the night scene of a downtown...beautiful....I enjoyed watching your photos flashing by!

  2. Okay, the proctologist one just cracked me up! LOL!

  3. Hysterical comments. Some people are so creative.
    Thanks for the laugh.

  4. I liked the Fatal Extraction one. :)

  5. -Snicker- Gosh, that was good. =]


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