Bunny Tales

Yes, I wrote that I would tell you about my unwanted basement visitors last week, but I forgot about Veterans Day. I still can't believe I did that. But I'm not the only one. Our bank scheduled a Veterans Day appointment with us. About the only way I know what day it is anymore is via Lizard's pillboxes...

Let me back up a day further than Bunny Number One. The day before our first uninvited guest, I was at the local grocery store to pick up a prescription for Lizard. He opted to wait in the car. Grocery stores overwhelm him. And the only problem we'd ever had with me leaving him alone in the car was the day six or seven years ago when his restless legs and claustrophia forced him to walk circles around the car.

A police officer was on scene when I returned to the car. Someone had reported that a man was casing my car, trying to break in. I had to explain the man in question was my husband, and that he was just trying to walk off his restless legs. All the local police are familiar with Lizard now, so we never have that problem now. That day brings us many memorable giggles these days.

Three weeks ago, the parking lot experience that occured is not one that will bring us giggles. An intimidatingly large man with a previously wrecked vehicle slammed into the back of our parked car. Lizard had exited the vehicle, thank heavens, and was pacing around the vehicle. Thank heavens again, the bike rack once again saved our vehicle. And the bike rack still works!!!

The incident caused Lizard severe nightmares that night. He was afraid the man would come looking for us. (Not going to happen. But anxiety is a huge part of advanced Parkinson's.)

Lizard had been telling me for for at least a couple of weeks we had a bunny in the basement. We could never find it when he called me down to see it, and I didn't see any bunny poop. (Didn't look hard enough, darn it! Boy, did we have a mess to clean up once I discovered the truth!!!) I thought Lizard was hallucinating because we actually did have a baby bunny jump in from the window well many years ago. We spent about an hour chasing it through the basement before we were able to catch it and release it into the garden. I thought the Parkinson's was bringing Lizard's memories to life, as it often does. Besides, we haven't opened the window well in months. How on earth would a bunny get in the basement???

The day after our car got hit in the grocery store parking lot, I took a basket of laundry into the basement and for the first time saw the bunny, who must have been starved, ready to make a mad dash up the stairs. I posted a call for help on our community FB group, and my neighbor came over almost immediately. Together we chased the bunny around the basement for about half an hour, and we thought it would be eating happily ever after in my front yard garden.

It was extremely distressing for me to find a bunny in the basement because if a bunny can get in there, raccoons, skunks and rattle snakes can get in there, too. We'd actually had a snake in the basement a couple of years ago, But discovering the bunny in the basement was real ended up being the best blessing... It totally took Lizard's mind of the grocery store parking lot incident, and the nightmares ended as quickly as they started.

It also was extremely disconcerting for me to find a bunny in the basement because in all likelihood, the bunny had fallen from the basement ceiling to the hard, cold concrete basement floor. I worried it might be injured, and just as we had done after finding the snake in the basement, we checked the entire perimeter of the basement in an unsuccessful attempt to find out how critters were getting inside our house. We've been sticking steel wool inside any tiny opening we find for years now. We haven't had a mouse or a rat in the basement since we had the concrete drilled to replace the damaged plumbing beneath the house. Thank heavens!!! But now, a bunny??? And no visible opening??? And what if one day we find a critter that didn't survive the fall???

When Lizard told me a week or so later he thought we had another bunny in the basement, I initially blamed it on hallucinations again. For less than five minutes. I suggested to him it might be a hallucination, but I told him I'd go down in the basement with him to look around. He's been trying to move boxes back into place after the previous week's bunny chase.

Before I spotted a couple of new bunny pellets, I noticed a section of insulation that looked as if it had been blown out of our unfinished basement framing, right along the ceiling. I could see rat and mouse pellets all over the floor underneath this new opening that had not been there before. I got the ladder and, not realizing I needed to wear a mask, I pulled the insulation out and discovered a huge hole where we suspect the previous homeowner had either moved a vent or wanted to move a vent. (We've noticed this variety of absent-minded construction throughout the house the entire 17 years we've lived here.) More rat and mouse droppings were abundant, and the insulation was full of what appeared to be rat and mouse nesting from years gone by. Now we know where they had been coming in. Finally. And I was literally choking on air for the next hour.

We had some plywood left over from when the young men in our church filled in the gap beneath our front porch with cement. I found a piece almost the perfect size, cut it to fit and nailed it across the opening. Three times while I was hammering, I saw the bunny, which had been frightened by the loud noise, scurry across the basement floor. Once again, it had not been a hallucination, but I already knew that from the insulation damage. I found some free insulation remnants on Craigslist, but it was two hours away. I knew Lizard would not be able to make that long of a drive with me at that time of day, and I couldn't leave him alone that long. So off to Lowe's we went.

I did not want to buy an entire roll of insulation. I'd seen suggestions online to ask if building material stores might have corners or edges left over from projects or from damaged rolls. Our extremely helpful and understanding sales rep was leading me back to the area where such might be found, if any, when he suddenly stopped at the spray insulation display and directed me to a pest-proof option. (He informed me some spray insulations are like candy to mice and rats.)

I used the spray insulation to fill in the newly covered gap in the basement, then sacrificed a couple of full-sized towels soaked in my avocado-dyeing ammonia to line the underside of our siding-covered bump-out footage on the outside of the compromised basement framing. The siding appeared warped in two areas, where animals probably had consistently sought shelter from the cold, and I pushed and braced them back into place as best I could, then wedged in the stinky towels, which I will re-soak with ammonia on a regular basis until I can get a more permanent solution.

Later that very same day, which seemed much longer than the 24 hours it actually encompassed, I tried to order a humane trap for overnight delivery. The only cages I could get overnight that late in the day were too small. So I had to wait 48 hours for our cage. (Yes, I called the local box stores, feed stores and building material stores, and none had the proper size in stock. Most informed me it would be up to two weeks before I would receive one if I ordered from them.)

Bunny Number One (which I suspect is also Bunny Number Two) had subsisted for two weeks on the amaryllis leaves and bulbs waiting to be brought up from the basement for Christmas blooming. Amaryllis are toxic to animals. Bunny Number One is very lucky to have survived those tortuous two weeks. (I did read that dead amaryllis leaves are not as bad but can still make animals very sick or cause pretty severe digestive issues.)

The amaryllis pots had been brought up to sit in the living room window on November 1. Bunny Number Two (which I suspect is repeat offender Bunny Number One) had no access to food or water for at least two days. I worried it might have been hurt in the fall, too. No doubt it was duly traumatized regardless.

I read up on what kind of foods might entice the bunny into the cage, then filled one little cup with grated carrots and zucchini and another little cup with water. I knew carrots aren't really the best food for a wild bunny, but I was hoping for a quick catch and fast relocation. I didn't think one carrot meal would be such a bad thing, particularly since the bunny probably was starved and dehydrated.

Bunny Number Two would devour the carrots inside the cage but apparently was not heavy enough to trigger the trap. I adjusted the sensitivity three times. Bunny would skeddaddle if I got too close. I'd read bunnies are intelligent enough to circumvent traps. I'd also read bunnies need about twice as much water as food, and that they don't stop eating when they are full, so you have to be very careful about feeding them too much. I would add a tiny bit more carrots and fill the water cup every hour or so, and the bunny never triggered the trap! But at least it was eating and drinking. And running when it saw me. I hoped like heck Bunny was healthy.

As sunset approached, I wondered if the cold concrete floor was traumatizing the already traumatized little critter. I put a washcloth on the bottom of the cage, hoping that might encourage Bunny to sleep in the cage, where it would be warmer than on the naked floor. I cut some grass and began regularly leaving clippings in the cage. Bunny wasted no time devouring everything I left for it. (Except the zucchini. Apparently bunnies don’t like zucchini. Lizard said smart Bunny. Ha ha ha!)

I hoped Bunny eventually would become comfortable enough in its new “family” that it might drop its guard and trigger the trap. Finally, just after sunset, the trap door snapped closed, and Bunny was inside!!! Cue for more trauma, but now at least it could get back outside where it would be less traumatized.

Caged Bunny curled up in the wash cloth and continued eating all the grass and drinking all the water I left for it. I decided not to relocate it until the following morning because that would give it a few hours to get accustomed to its new surroundings and help it hopefully avoid becoming a meal in the cold and dark.

My initial plan the second time around was to relocate Bunny. I suspected it was the same bunny because both times, my backyard bunny seemed to have disappeared the duration of the basement "hallucinations". Bunny Number One wasted no time "finding" my backyard, where it appeared to know exactly where to find shelter. Also, I'd read bunnies like to potty in the same place, just like raccoons. Bunny Number One consistently pottied in the same basement corner (where I didn't see it) until an apparent amaryllis hangover messed up its digestive tract. Bunny Number Two pottied in the same place Bunny Number One pottied before digesting undigestibles. Bunny Number Two also wasted no time "finding" my backyard, which it seemed all too familiar with.

I had planned to release the bunny just outside the tiny village where I live so as not to inflict it upon other unsuspecting homeowners. It would not be near traffic, so it wouldn't be roadkill. The elevation would be the same, the flora would be the same, and I thought having a full day would give it time to re-establish itself so as not to become a meal come nightfall.

The weather forecast that night changed my mind. Bunny, which I believe to be a teenager or very young adult, had been living beneath the bump-out most of its short life and in my insulation and/or basement for at least the last month. It had not been exposed to overnight freezes, and the next night was forecast to be a very hard freeze. If I released it in new territory where it knew no predator escape routes, had no familiar kin and no shelter, I would be a murderer.

How could I give this little Bunny a death sentence just for eating my garden??? I couldn't. Relocating it was unthinkable.

So, Bunny is still in my backyard, and I've checked each day to make sure it is still alive. Bunny has become more accustomed to my presence and doesn't appear as fearful of me. I got into the habit of talking softly and affectionately to it while it was in the cage in an effort to reduce its stress. I think it thinks we are friends now. Maybe even family. And for now, that's okay. I've even considered crocheting a little blanket for it. Does this mean I have a pet??? :)

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